Never Eat Peas

When I say never eat peas
I don't mean never eat them with cheese,
I don't mean never eat them with fleas,
I mean never eat peas full stop.
They're small green round things
that don't even have strings
and look nothing like rings.
They just hop about the place
jumping over your plates
as though they know how to elaborate
assimilate and plan an escape.
I'm aware that peas can't rap,
but that doesn't mean they can't sing
when hit by a fork or a hot water spring.
They don't go with chips or beans.
What does the word pea even mean?


In short I can safely conclude,
peas are no good for me or you
or anyone else for that matter.
I'd much prefer cod and batter.
Now it's time to end these horrendous rhymes
and finish this as the clock of doom chimes.


Never eat peas.


The Tiger Poet